The art of motherhood begins at different times for every woman. For some it may be as soon as they see those little two blue lines appear, for others it may be months before preparing their body for IVF. The truth is that we are all in it together as a womanhood, yes we all have different paths, but we all go through similar journeys. This is why we should support each other, instead of being judgemental of other mums. We all have our own ideas and ways in which we want to parent which is great, what works for one woman may not work for the other. I have learnt so many things on my journey as a mother, some helpful and some not so helpful. You will notice that everyone will want to give you their advice and expect you to put it into action. This is where you go into your own zone and own art of motherhood.
You will feel pressure from parents, grandparents, friends, aunties etc, to parent like they did. However, you may have decided that you want to do it a different way. Maybe they had strict routines, but you want to co-sleep or feed on demand. The truth is there is no wrong way, it’s all just personal preference. As long as baby is getting enough food and sleep then don’t worry.
When you become a mother you will more than likely feel consumed by it, that is because it is such a demanding job. The art of motherhood is reaching a happy medium where you feel like a good enough mother but you also have a life and hobbies that you do regularly. Losing who you are is not going to help anyone in the long run.
Don’t try to be perfect
Perfect doesn’t exist, and no matter how hard you try you will never reach this land of perfectionism. If you do try to reach it, I can promise you that you will not be a happy mum. The art of motherhood is about balance and making sure you don’t feel pressured.
Respecting your needs as well as your children’s and partners is paramount. If you don’t fill up your cup first then you will not have the energy or inclination to fill up everybody else’s. As you are probably finding out, mother’s are the centre of the family and if mum is not feeling good then everyone else will be feeling it.
Stay true to you
We all have our own values in life and by staying true to your own and not what someone else expects will leave you more aligned with yourself. Your values will change over time but that will be your decision. The art of motherhood is ever-changing as your life evolves from being childless, to having babies, older kids and when they have left home. By staying true to yourself and your own needs, values and dreams then life will be a lot smoother and you will feel more fulfilled.